PTSD / Diary of a Vet's Wife / Be Tenacious

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, of which have the potential to turn a life around.   ~ Leo Buscaglia

Yesterday I was stuck in traffic on the way to work. I was running late but it was my own fault. There always seems to be one more thing calling my name before I leave the house. Cars were bumper to bumper in front of me and it took the light forever to change. 

When the traffic finally started to move I noticed a silver utility box on the sidewalk scrawled with graffiti ... or so I thought.

As I pulled up next to it, I saw what it said ... it put a smile on my face!

TODAY DO A RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS

I planned to take a picture to share on my blog on the way home, but later when I drove by, it appeared the utility company had covered the smile provoking words with silver paint. 

It made me sad because it could have brightened so many more lives as it had mine ...

Diary of a Vet's Wife, Loving and Living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, my memoir, has become my mission to reach as many families as possible dealing with the unpredictable chaos this malady plants in the middle of our dreams. I've been there and I know the helplessness that leaves you weak and the endless tears that warm your cheeks at night.

My heartfelt desire is to give you HOPE in the only way I know how ... by sharing my journey and what I've learned through SURVIVAL. It's not a quick fix, but it is POSSIBLE. All I ask is that you read what has happened to me with an open heart and mind. Try to savor the words without judgement and feel the healing begin to fill in the holes.
  
Are you living with PTSD?  The road back may look impossible but remember all the people in your life who love you ... including me because I know where you've been and where you are now.

If you've read Diary of a Vet's Wife, you already know what happened to me. The time has come where I need to begin to alternate my viewpoint from our shared pain to the peace and understanding waiting in the wings.

Today I read something that told me it was time to move forward and begin to share the healing process that continues to amaze and embrace me. I believe the words that are touching me so profoundly will also nourish your heart with love and strength. Please promise to give me a chance ...

BE TENACIOUS

Dr. John Maxwell says one day when he was discouraged and tempted to quit, he took out a dictionary and looked up the word "quit." After spending a few minutes considering that option, in a symbolic act of defiance he took out his scissors and cut the word right out of his dictionary. It didn't make his problems go away, but it sure did strengthen his resolve. 

When every avenue looks like a dead end and you feel like you've exhausted every possibility - you haven't. There are always other ways, other options, other opportunities. Even if you don't see them right now, they are there. So don't give up. Former heavy weight champion Jack Dempsey once said, "A champion is one who gets back up when he can't. People who reach their goal keep going when they think they can't. They're tenacious, and as a result they keep moving closer to their goal day by day. Some days they may be moving only a few inches at a time, but they're moving forward. They believe in their God-given destiny, they believe in themselves, and they say so. 

Now, saying you believe in yourself won't guarantee your success, but saying you don't believe in yourself will guarantee your failure. The truth is you're not alone, God is with you. "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak" (Isaiah 40:29). So be tenacious!

(Taken from: The Word For You Today - August 25, 2014)

My post today is shorter than usual, but this way I will be motivated to write more often on the spur of the moment. Long posts take time to create like a chapter in a book. This approach with be something new for me and I hope it will be met with your favor. 

Better Things Ahead 

"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind."  C. S. Lewis (2006)

Our Soldiers are Returning / Write Your Heart Out

The holidays are upon us and the busy-ness is endless, so today I've done something different . . .

Our soldiers have returned from Iraq this week, just in time for the holidays, and I decided to repost a blog from May . . . which shows what's in my heart and why I write. 

My heart is over-joyed for these families that have been reunited, yet in the dark recesses of my mind, I remember so well and worry.  My prayers are that these men and women are counseled and debriefed before being expected to fit back into society, and are given a solid contact name to call, if needed.  Someone who has been where they have been, someone they can trust with their feelings!  Also, that their families and friends have compassion and patience as these warriors try to adjust back into family life.

This is their GREATEST DESIRE . . . please remember where they've been and what they've been through.

The trick is keeping your heart open.     Natalie Goldberg

May 5, 2011

This blog began as a tool to move me into publishing.  Accountability for my time and actions was my purpose.  Most entries have been lighthearted and chatty, other than the first.  But the time has come when I must share more.  And I'm uncomfortable.  So please bear with me.

Write your heart out.  Never be ashamed of your subject and your passion for your subject.     Joyce Carol Oates

War has gone on since the beginning of man's creation.  And will continue until the end of time.  This necessary evil brings death and pain not only to its victims, but also to the warriors and their loved ones covering our small planet.  It's not the way we'd like it to be . . . it is the way it is.

Brave men and women fight wars in hostile lands where life is valued differently.  Armed with rifles, they're exposed to sights and sounds no human being should ever witness.  And at times, they must engage in unthinkable acts to save their friends, which riddles them with shame and guilt.  Or they survive an ambush and the others don't. 

Can you imagine the horror? 

It's not a movie in the theater you pay to watch . . . it's real life!  And it's happening this moment in remote parts of the world.  How does a warrior return to a normal life with this running through their head?

It's called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder . . . a normal reaction to abnormal life threatening stress. 

Those who know me know my story.  They know what I wrote about, and why.  And those who don't know me, other than through this blog, will one day share an experience . . . one that will be hard to forget.

My book?  It's a love story.  And shows how I met the love of my life and we were married.  He was a Vietnam vet.  I didn't know he had post traumatic stress disorder.  I didn't know what post traumatic stress disorder was.  Nor did I know I would develop PTSD from living with my husband's illness. 

The ravages of war tainted our marriage eclipsing it into a nightmare.  And by grace alone, my love gave me the strength and the courage to survive.

I Corinthians 13:4-7  Love suffers long and is kind . . . bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  

Excerpt from my book proposal . . .

Diary of a Vet's Wife shows the innocence of love unblemished with hope and promise, unaware of the imminent demons vowing destruction.  And all too soon her impossible dream is shattered by nightmares her husband doesn't recall and hidden pain he refuses to share.  Her love is unyielding, her journey is long.  She retreats to a life of secrets in order to spare the children and her family from the truth, yet she has no place to turn.

The reader will slip into her world like a fly on the wall as she takes them places most have never been, while bonding with others who know the terrain that only love dare travel.

So there you have it . . .

Lesson learned . . . my two cents

Be open to your readers opinions . . . they're one of the reasons you write.

Show compassion to our brave men and women who have served and suffered for this nation, and our safety. You never know what a person is going through by looking at them.  Would you lay down your life for your country?  Please do me a favor.  When you see someone in uniform, or meet someone who has served in our military, go up to them, shake their hand and say, "Thank you."  It would mean so much to them.  I know from experience . . .

Ebooks . . . A Contemporary "David and Goliath"

Books are no more threatened by Kindle than stairs by elevators.           - Stephen Fry

But has Stephen Fry seen the research on this anomaly?

This is a sad day for all who love books.  It was announced that our beloved Borders would close forever on Sunday, September 18, 2011.  Rumors were flying like locust, but the starkness of the situation was a jarring reality. It's happened!!

Ebooks are now being viewed as the new bully on the block as they push forward toppling the mega-booksellers in their wake.  Much like these same establishments buried the small bookstores of the past, which was the premise for the movie, "You've Got Mail" . . . if you remember.
 
Last week, a member of SheWrites brought an article to our attention.  This article noted a decline in the sale of adult paperbooks of 64%, whereas the increase in Ebook sales was 162%.  These figures are staggering!!

Technology has proven Ebooks are here to stay.  We must adapt our writing careers with this in mind.  The entire publishing world is changing like a giant Transformer . . . and no one knows for sure what it will look like in the end.

(Note: Much of this information has been drawn from the article listed below with the author's written permission.)

"I believe there will be a war between the writers who want agents and traditional publishers to "take care of them" and indie writers who want to control their own careers."    - Barry Eisler

Another article mentioned that some publishers attempt to slow the transition from paper to digital by holding back the Ebook release date, or they may authorize insanely high Ebook prices.  

We're the writers.  We provide the content that is printed and distributed. 
 
For hundreds of years, writers couldn't reach readers without publishers.  We needed them.  Suddenly, we don't.  Publishers don't seem to be taking this into account.

It appears that most publishers offer 25% royalty on ebooks, which equates to 14.9% to the writer after everyone gets their cut.  Now consider there's virtually no cost to creating Ebooks . . . no cost for paper, no shipping charges, no warehousing.  No cut for Ingram or Baker & Taylor.  Yet they're keeping 52.5% of the list price and offering only 17.5% to the author.  Does this seem right?

NYT best seller Barry Eisler turns down $500,000 advance in favor of Self-Publishing.

I mentioned this same article in last week's blog.  I don't know how many of you found the time to read it, but please do your career this favor.  Google: Ebooks and Self-Publishing - A dialog Between Authors Barry Eisler and Joe Konrath."  It's a MUST READ for anyone ready to publish their work.  The article is extensive, but worth the time . . . then decide for yourself.

Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.    - C.S. Lewis

I'm a new kid on the block.  I've spent sixteen years writing my memoir, my first book, and my journey into publishing has opened my eyes to a world I was unfamiliar with.  In my other life, I worked as a Sr. Buyer in Aerospace and Electronic manufacturing, both on an international basis.  That is, until these companies moved overseas in order to increase their bottom-line profit.  Was this fair?  Not for me . . . and the thousands of other displaced workers left behind without jobs in America.  But it too happened . . .

And it taught me a valuable lesson . . . LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP.  In essence, do your research!! 

 "Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn."   -  C.S. Lewis

My original plan was to query agents for one year . . . until November.  Then move into self-publishing, if I wasn't picked up by an agent.  Little did I know what was happening behind the scenes . . .

The explosion of the Internet gives writers the opportunity to do tremendous online promoting: blogs, social networking, chatrooms . . . and now with digital books, there's no more profitable use of an author's time than writing . . . traveling and book tours may become passe.

The writer must believe that what he is doing is the most important thing in the world. And he must hold to this illusion even when he knows it is not true.   - John Steinbeck

Ask yourself this question . . . Are you writing for pleasure or money?
 
Personally, I love to write!  The entire process makes me feel complete, doing what I was born to do.  But it's hard work!  Most people hold a 9 to 5 job, Monday through Friday, where they collect a paycheck for their time and productivity. Writing should be no different . . . but it is! We work in isolation, sometimes for years, creating a piece of work from our very soul that hopefully will touch others. And we too would like to be paid for our work . . . I know I would.

I think Henry Miller has had huge influence not because he wrote about sex, but because the memoir or the nonfiction novel has become such a monumental force in American publishing, if not in literature.       - Leslie Fiedler

There are two major differences between virtual shelves and physical shelves.

• A virtual shelf is infinite.  A bookstore has a limited amount of space.  Books are crammed spine out, and copies are limited.  A virtual shelf, like Amazon or Smashwords, carries all titles, all the time.
•  A virtual shelf is forever.  In a bookstore, you have anywhere from a few weeks to a few months to sell your title, and then it gets returned.  A big waste of money. 

But Ebooks are forever.  Once they're live, they will sell for decades.  Someday, long after we are gone, our grandchildren may be getting our royalties.  Forever is a long time to earn royalties!

If you're thinking about Self-Publishing, be sure your manuscript has been refined to perfection, as you would do when submitting to an agent.   

You can make 70% self-publishing!  You can set your own price.  There are reams of data what show how ebooks under $5 vastly outsell those priced higher.  This is a critical point.  Digital books are a price-sensitive market, and it appears maximum revenues are achieved at a price point between $.99 and $4.99.  You set the price, but keep this in mind.  You can always lower it later . . . have an international sale!

Lessons learned . . . my two cents 

If you find you are having trouble writing and nothing seems real, just write about food.  Write about the foods you love most.  Be specific. Details.  Where did you eat it, who were you with, what season was it? 
  - Natalie Goldberg

Think of "Julie and Julia". . . one of my  most favorite and delicious movies!  This movie taught me how to cook mushrooms to taste like succulent bites of fillet mignon.  The secret?  Butter and . . . "don't crowd the mushrooms!"

Welcome!! I'm so happy you stopped by during Blogger Ball #7.

My name is Nancy MacMillan, and my blog is My Uncharted Journey into Publishing My First Book, a memoir, Diary of a Vet's Wife, subtitled, Loving and Living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  My blog shares the steps I'm taking towards publishing and what I'm learning along the way, which I share weekly with others.  My first blog on April 9th, In The Beginning, sets the stage . . .

Please share your thoughts on this topic by leaving a comment  listed below in red, and include a link to your blog.  I'll visit and comment as soon as possible, I promise!  Then double-click on the bookshelves to return to SheWrites.  And please visit again. 

What is a Synopsis and Why? . . . Part One

As a general rule, I believed a Synopsis was used to sell most fiction books, whereas a Book Proposal was the selling tool for nonfiction.  My book is a memoir and I was taught a book proposal would be required for submission.  I spent agonizing months laboring over this monster to put it kindly, and was ready to throw a party when I was finished.  Yet my research  uncovered a conundrum between the two . . . different books, articles and agents say one thing . . . while others say just the opposite.  Great!
 
The solution:  Be prepared to do both . . . unless you know something I don't know, or plan to self-publish.

. . . See B is for Book Proposal . . . Part One and Two in May & June.
 
Your initial contact determines the agent's first impression of you.  You want to be professional and brief.  Research plays an important role, show the agent you've done your homework.

"Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don't give up."       Anne Lamott

Submission guidelines . . . The agent I described in my last blog stated they do not accept email queries.  This pleased me because of all the email queries I've sent . . . only 1 replied.  Instead, this new agent asked for a query letter,  a 1-3 page synopsis, and the first 50 pages of my manuscript, which is different from most.   Rewriting my query letter was a snap compared to the synopsis.  My original synopsis is part of my book proposal.  I slaved to shave the 109 chapters in Diary of a Vet's Wife down to 7 pages and I was RELIEVED when it was DONE!  Now I'm being asked to condense this same information into 1-3 pages!  Are they serious???

The SYNOPSIS is the most important part of your submission package!!!

It's your selling tool . . . your ticket in the door!  And it can prove harder to write than the actual book, but it's worth it.  You must develop, sweat over and polish it . . . giving it the same attention you devoted to your book!

Your query letter and synopsis are what sells the editor on your manuscript!

Your synopsis is an outline describing the general events of your book written in the PRESENT TENSE NARRATIVE. 

Some key questions to answer in a synopsis:

  What is your story about?

•   Who are the main characters?
•   What do these characters want?
•   What stands in their way of getting it?

A short description of the main theme of a nonfiction work should focus on:

•   The Main Characters
•   The Main Plot
•   The Main Conflicts 

How to Write a Great Synopsis . . . 

1. Focus on your characters and what is happening to them!
2. Give editor a sense of setting, tone and pace of your book.  They are your reader . . . entice them.
3. Follow the editors instructions!!! 
4. Don't reproduce first pages of your book!  Make synopsis original, yet a true representation of your story at the same time.
5. DON'T LEAVE OUT THE CLIFF HANGERS.
6. Don't include character's physical description
7. Don't include secondary characters, unless important to plot and affect your character

One Step at a Time . . .

Don't be intimidated . . . break it down . . . step by step

•   Sit for a final reading with a pen and notebook
•   As you finish each chapter, write a 1 or 2 paragraph summary
•   What happened?
•   Where?
•   To which character?

Notice themes running through chapters as you read.  Make note of themes.  You may uncover your one-line summary agents and editors like so much.

When you are done, you will have a chapter by chapter book outline called the author's outline.

Though this outline is no longer favored by editors and agents, it will remain one of your most valuable writing tools.  Never throw it away!  This outline will help if you ever decide to revise your novel.

Immediate use for the outline . . . Now you can pinpoint the most important plot points in the outline and put them into the synopsis. 

To be continued . . .

My trip to Ohio . . .

At my mom's, I was greeted by 100 empty cream puff shells, covered in plastic wrap, waiting on my bedroom dresser.  She's 94 and my cousin assisted in this endeavor.  As tradition goes, I help mom and my sister fill and frost these delicate shells the morning of the reunion. 

Mom was up early, too excited to sleep, and had 40-some filled before I wandered into the kitchen for coffee.  Everything went well until it was time for the frosting.  Mom didn't have a recipe . . . it's in her head and all she remembered was the list of ingredients!  What to do?  So, like 3 mad scientists, we added a little bit-of-this and a little bit-of-that into the pan hoping it won't turn to fudge. Soon mom announced, "It feels right," as she sat stirring the smooth, warm chocolate with a wooden spoon.

The cream puffs were perfection.  All 45 at the reunion once again savored this infamous delicacy . . . unaware of our chaos.

Lessons learned . . . my two cents

"Literary experience heals the wound, without undermining the privilege, of individuality."  C.S. Lewis 

2011 Agents . . . What Do They Really Want?

It was November 2010 . . . I had made a vow to query agents and publishers for one full year before I'd seriously consider Self-Publishing my memoir.  But somewhere along the way I was subtly seduced by the many facets of marketing, drawn from a multitude of online articles and books I discovered.  Soon I was up to my chin in market research gasping for air, while my Agents sulked in the corner.

This came to a screeching halt last Sunday afternoon when I realized how many days and months had vanished . . . it was time to get back on track.

Self-discipline is a writer's key to success!  We must be as passionate in our self-discipline as we are in our writing!  It doesn't come easy, but it can be attained with practice.  I must stay focused!

The future of your book is in the hands of the person who knows more about it . . . cares more about it . . . and will benefit more from it than anyone else . . . you!     
               Michael Larsen, How to Write a Book Proposal

My initial blog on Agents was posted June 19th, so let me continue . . .

At first, I was excited to be searching for an agent after spending 16 years writing my memoir.  Once the novelty wore off, I was able to look at the process more clearly and uncover key data . . .

• Most agents want clients with the ability to produce more than one book stating they represent careers . . . not books.
• If your writing focuses on a particular area . . . you may benefit by submitting your work directly to a small or specialized press.  Small presses often give greater attention to the writer with editorial help and marketing expertise. 

Since my book is a memoir, my research should focus on the small or specialized presses.  I will never stop writing . . . I'm only uncertain of the genre.

An exciting find for my memoir . . . On Friday, I came across an agent who has worked in the publishing business since 1979, first as an editor at W.W. Norton.  There she published DEAR AMERICA: Letters Home From Vietnam, which became an Emmy award-winning documentary.  This is the first agent I've found who was passionate about my subject.  Will my query letter ignite this flame again?  Only time will tell.  This weekend I plan to redraft my query for submission.  All prayers are welcome . . .

What are agents really looking for?

• Agents can only spend a minute at most reading your query letter . . . explain what you want them to know IMMEDIATELY.  They want to be taken by SURPRISE.  Be surprising!
• Fiction - Agents look for a track record.  Are you committed to your craft and building an audience?
• Memoir is a tricky genre.  Agents look for two main things: a UNIQUE story and GREAT writing.  Memoirs should read like novels.  They should have suspense, conflict, emotion, character development, dialogue and narrative throughout.  Why will people be interested in you?
• Why are you qualified to write what you wrote and how does it DIFFER from what's already been published on this topic?
• Agents want to see a MARKETING PLAN.  What the author can really do that will sell the book, not wishful thinking.
• It's not rude to ask for more detailed feedback following a rejection . . . but be POLITE.

A sampling of agent footnotes:

1. "We like storytelling defined - by its extraordinary power to resonate universally on a deeply emotional level."
2. "We seek strong new voices in fiction and nonfiction and are fiercely dedicated to our authors."
3. "Narrative nonfiction - projects that simply teach me something new about the greater world and society around us."
4. "Accomplished storytellers with their own distinct voice, who are able to create psychological conflict with their narrative."
5. "Projects that tackle big topics with an unusual approach."
6. "An analysis of why your proposed book is different and better than the competition is essential."

What your giving can do is . . . help your reader be braver . . . be better than they are . . . be open to the world again.   Anne Lamott, bird by bird


The 34th Annual Family Reunion . . . 

I leave for Ohio on Thursday at 8:05 a.m.  This is where I grew up . . . until my husband was transferred to California.  Yipee!!  I escaped the SNOW!

The announcement displays a full-color group photo with my mother, the matriarch of our family, seated in a folding chair surrounded by grinning faces and a sea of children at her feet.  42 attended last year.  These are my roots, where I feel safe in times of trouble.  Though we may not always agree, we're a family who cares with unconditional love.

At 94, my mom still lives at home with the help of a caregiver five mornings a week.  Her mind is sharp as any of you, though her body grows weak.  She may use a walker, but every year she makes over 100 cream puffs from scratch for "her family."  This is tradition. 

I look forward to this trip back in time, surrounded by family and friends, reliving tales of when we were young.  Two weeks brimming with lots of love, lots of laughter and lots of food.  These times I truly miss . . . until I remember the SNOW!

Lesson learned . . . my two cents  

"We meet no ordinary people in our lives." - C.S. Lewis 

A Platform . . . Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone

SheWrites - Blog Ball #5 


http://megwaiteclayton.com/1stbooks/shewrites/

Welcome - My name is Nancy MacMillan and I joined SheWrites in April to learn more about Marketing.  This is my first blog hop . . . what a fascinating idea!

My blog is my Uncharted Journey into Publishing my First Book, "Diary of a Vet's Wife, Loving and Living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder," a completed memoir.  I share tidbits of myself, my thoughts and the steps I'm taking along this path to reach my goal.  Included are my query letter, table of contents from my book proposal, and an exerpt from my book.  

Thank you for stopping by. Please feel free to look around and leave a comment to say hello, so I can be sure to visit your blog this weekend.


Guilt! Guilt! Guilt!  My head is buzzing with everything I need to do . . . but I don't.  Instead I push these thoughts aside as I continue to pursue my dream, my passion . . . on the road to publishing my first book.

I used to be a perfectionist! Ask my children. That’s the way I was raised, it’s swimming through my veins, playmates with my genes . . . I guess that’s why these pangs of guilt.   

The house is picked up . . . though my office looks lived-in like an old pair of slippers with stacks of books and layers of research. I see dust silently gathered in spots I missed with my Swifter . . . my quickie.  My windows don’t sparkle, my floor doesn't shine, but I do vacuum . . . my carpet is white.  My bulletin board is a rainbow of Post-Its like . . . book flight for reunion and load recycling into car.  Speaking of my car . . . my raincoat and a pair of slacks for the cleaners have been passengers for a month, and my oil change is 1000 miles overdue.

Okay, now that I've had this little rant I feel better . . .     

I had to learn how to fit writing into my daily schedule, whereas marketing and research are more of a challenge with a complicated appeal.  But blogging is like chocolate . . . delicious and addictive.  Do I have a problem?  Maybe . . .   

Now can someone tell me how to fit my daily schedule back into my writing?

Platform development is important for authors, and crucial for aspiring and soon-to-be authors.  -Christina Katz

In the past, a writer could dream of being picked up by an agent and/or publisher who would woo them with the promise of fortune and fame.  But not anymore . . . Today, it's the writer's job to root through the rubble and bang on doors . . . after years spent refining their words, followed by countless revisions, finally giving birth to a piece of work that stands on its own.

My problem, like many others, is that this is my first book and I'm unknown!

No one has analyzed the complexities of a writer's life so painstakingly as Virginia Woolf in her many volumes of diaries.     Joyce Carol Oates

I find the most intimidating part of marketing a book to be the endless avenues that I must travel publically to reach my goal.  If rejections don't toughen a person . . . marketing will.  It's time I step out of my hallowed space of creativity into a world of crashing cymbals and blaring horns.  Not really . . . but the contrast can be equally as stressful.   

I've been reading GET KNOWN before the BOOK DEAL by Christina Katz, and her down-to-earth approach has desensitized some of my trepidation.

Random notes:  Your personality is just the raw material you have to work with when it's time to get out in the world.  You need to physically get your buns out there.  You need to get your real face out in the real world and you need to interact with real live people.  Like rocks in a tumbler, we grow smoother by rubbing up against each other.  Don't hide out!  Come out and play.

See why I like her? . . . Make a beginning.  No launch is too humble when we are talking about stretching yourself as a reader, speaker, and performer.  You have to start somewhere.  So why not try speaking or reading even if you're totally untrained. 

Her words sparked confidence as I clearly saw my "humble beginning" had already been achieved.  My writing class in Santa Barbara, and the first time I read my work outloud in front of a class of 46 students.  I was petrified . . . but each time I read it was easier.

She also suggests: "Children's Story Time" . . .   A few years ago, when I was working on my children's writing, I talked to a local librarian about reading at story time, to observe children interacting.  She said, "Come by anytime."  But I got busy and never followed through.  This goes back on my to-do-list!

She also recommends literary events in your local area.  Fill a chair at one literary event each week.  Take notes on how you might adopt the speaker's skills and strengths in your own presentations.  It could be fun!

A few weeks ago, I learned a church nearby holds a 6-week public speaking class.  I'm waiting for the dates and time.  Once I get over this hump, I should be on my way . . .

Lesson Learned . . . My Two Cents

Below is a recipe from a fellow writer, Lori Robinson, who leads Safari's in Africa, when she's not writing.  She takes these nuts with her on safari for snacks in the bush, serves them to friends as appetizers, and basically can't stop eating them herself.  I plan to make a batch this week, once I shop for ingredients.

Safari Nuts . . .
Recipe:  In bowl mix 2 c macadamia nuts (raw) with 1/4 c maple syrup, 1 1/2 t ground chili pepper, 1 t curry powder, 1/2 t cayanne pepper, 1/4 salt.

Spread evenly on parchment paper covered cookie sheet and roast at 300 degrees for about 20 minutes.  Keep turning to brown evenly and keep from burning.  Once cooled, they will be crunchy.

You can visit her unique blog at AfricaInside.org . . .

Please note:  I've decided to post every other week for a while to focus more time on marketing and research.  SheWrites Marketing Group has posted excellent material and ideas I want to impliment.  Will miss our weekly visits.   

Marketing in an Electronic World. . . My First Steps

Writing is ninety percent listening.  You listen so deep to the space around you that it fills you, and when you write, it pours out of you.                         Natalie Goldberg, Writing Down the Bones

Our world may teem with pain and violence, but we have the ability to turn off the chatter, and open our minds to the peace and tranquility all around us . . . this is your choice.

I see wonder in the ordinary, and often get lost in taking pictures of no one . . . pictures without people. 

A weathered wooden fence dappled with layers of peeling blue paint, lifted by decades of heat and rain.  A single rusty nail draws me close.  Who pounded that nail and why?  "Click, click."  Or white crusted barnacles growing on the pilings under Santa Monica pier like on a grizzled old whale.  "Click, click."  Staircases, fire escapes, the angles, the lines.  "Click, click."  A vine hidden treehouse abandoned in the woods long ago.  Where are the laughing children who once played there?  "Click, click." 

Shadows are my favorite, clinging to their subject, if only by a thread.  Shadows add character, depth and dimension to the existing beauty.  If only I can catch it before it disappears.  "Click, click."

Do others see what I see?

Less than 10 percent of new writers have enough promotional ammunition to interest large publishers.                                    
                     Michael Larsen, How to Write a Book Proposal

Never before has a writer had more opportunities to market their own book than today.  Technology continues to advance at such a fast pace it's hard to keep up.  Yet, this is one of the most success-filled avenues to promote your book . . . and the best news is that your choices are ENDLESS.

I'm still wallowing in information, but I want to share what I'm learning as I go . . .

• Start promoting BEFORE your book is finished - Your objective should be to first create interest.  Then sustain that interest as you build on it.  This will begin your potential reader base . . .  

Currently, my book is in its final edit.  Kay Thompson Lee, my freelance editor, is smoothing out any rough edges she may find, and I'm extremely pleased with her subtle changes and expertise.

• Create a blog

The first item on my to-do-list, and soon-to-be constructed MARKETING PLAN, was to create a blog . . . my first blog ever.  This was accomplished on Google Blogspot with little difficulty.  My first post was April 9, 2011, and as of today, I've had 1020 page viewers, which includes many other countries.  I'm stunned but delighted because my story needs to be heard.   

How did this happen? 

Each week, after I post my new blog, I send an announcement to all friends and family in my email address book (approx. 80).  This way they know it's posted, and don't have to search for it.  And they have the option whether to view it now or later, or not at all.

• Join a Writers Group Online

Next, I joined SheWrites, which is an online writers group that was recommended.  SheWrites consists of groups within the group, depending on your genre, interests and the stage of your work.  I joined Blogging about Books and Writing . . . Memoir Writers . . . I'm Thinking of Self-Publishing . . . Marketing Ideas . . . and What Did You Blog About Today?

Each day, SheWrites forwards emails from these writers showing what they posted that day.  I reply to the emails of interest, or to new friends I've made.  My blog address is attached at the end of my reply.  This is time consuming, but definitely joy-filled, and a necessary tool for your success.  And I've met the most amazing women! 

This is where Time Management plays a key role.  And once I figure out how to manage my time . . . I'll be the first to share because I know all writers wrestle with the infamous time bandit.

The women on SheWrites are talented writers willing to share their expertise.  It's been a pleasure getting to know them, and their work, gleaning new ideas daily.  Their comments and encouragement were unexpected, offering friendship from across the country and around the world. 

 . . . to be continued.  

Lesson learned . . . my two cents

Anytime you meet someone new, and they learn you're a writer and show interest . . . NEVER miss an opportunity to ASK for their email address.  Then add it to your address book ASAP (placing a key word next to their name for later recall where you met).  Little pieces of paper have a tendency to disappear, and you don't have time to waste looking for it . . . nor lose a potential sale.

Note:  You can visit:  In The Beginning . . . and Q is for Query Letter . . .  to learn what my book is about.

B Is For Book Proposal . . . Part Two

How all this life would vanish, evaporate, if I didn't clutch at it, cling to it, while I still remember some twinge or glory.                   Sylvia Plath

My goal is not to bore you with the mechanics of writing a book proposal.  Rather my blog is meant to show what I've learned as a novice, having possessed an insatiable need to write my story and get it out of my head.  I want to reach others who have stories of their own chewing at their insides.  And give them hope and encouragement to step off the edge and feel the wind in their face.

I'm still unsure how, or who will publish my book, I can only share the steps I've taken and why.  A book proposal is part of this process.  Each of us must find our own way . . . this is my uncharted journey.

You don't write because you want to say something: You write because you've got something to say.                                          F. Scott Fitzgerald

Your book proposal must answer these questions:
          Why this book?
          Why you?

The crucial first paragraphs of your introduction must hook the editor with the single most exciting thing you can write that makes your book new, needed and timely.  You have approximately 20 seconds to get their attention.  How's that for pressure?

Below is a brief description of each phase of my proposal:

Premise - Your topic must stand out and fill a distinct need with national, and possibly international appeal.
Overview - Show how your book satisfies that need by reaching your readers curiosity, heart or mind.  Think of this section as an expanded book-jacket blurb.
Manuscript -  Status of your manuscript and book proposal.  How long until completion, or completed? 
Note:  It's best to have a book proposal completed when you begin to send query letters.  Agents and publishers need this tool, if they're interested.  Delay may quench that appeal.
Charastics of reader -  Know your readers.  Who will buy your book?
Statistics - Are there statistics that show a growing need for your topic?  If so, show them.
Example:  US Military in Afghanistan had lost 761 soldiers in combat, but a higher number in service.  817 had taken their own lives over the same period.  The surge of suicide has risen five years in a row.  Mark Thompson - Time Magazine  April 13, 2010. 
Competition -  List other books on your topic, and show why yours is different and/or unique.
The Author - Emphasize your authority for writing the book.  I was intimitated as a writer with no prior achievements.  In class, I was told to list writing classes, conferences, community functions I've attended, and any other areas that might give me creditability.
Mission Statment - Optional.
Synopsis -  This was more difficult.  In the end, I condensed my entire book to 5 single-spaced pages.  This included chapter highlights, noting each main character, important scenes, and the end.
Sample Chapters - In this area, I chose my first chapter, and one of my "best" chapters.  A chapter filled with action and emotion.

Writing my book proposal was a labor of love.  It was complex and demanding, but it helped me to grow as a writer.  For this I am grateful.

New Zealand . . . I'm so jealous of their accent

My trip to Auckland was amazing, other than some cold rainy days. I arrived almost 2 hours late, which upset Max (7) who alerted others in the airport his Nana was missing.  And I noticed Charlie (4) had picked up some of the accent.  My favorite word was "Da-dee."  I loved it! 

One afternoon, my daughter and I took a ferry to Waiheke Island for lunch at the Mudbrick Vineyard.  Our view overlooked the vineyards to the sea where we watched the rain approach.  We sipped white wine made from grapes grown there, while dining on elegantly prepared dishes.  But I must warn you . . . don't order the scallops because you only get TWO.  And I was hungry.

The days were filled new places, new faces and lovely food.  Too many to mention here.  A few things I found unique:  Children weren't required to wear shoes in school . . . Cars drive on the other side of the street, which is scary going up a mountain . . . Time seems to go more slowly . . . People are extremely polite, cars drive slower, and no one ever honks their horn.  Can you imagine?   

The night before I left, we were invited to a lovely dinner at a neighbors, whose parents and their friends were visiting from Australia.  It was one of the nicest evenings I can remember.  And my son-in-laws roasted beet root with sliced avacado was a hit.

It was a wonderful trip and I'm thrilled I went, even though it was winter.  Thank you, Tiff and Scott for your gracious hospitality.

Lesson Learned . . . my two cents 

Writing a book proposal is much like eating an elephant . . . one bite at a time.

Q Is For Query Letter . . .

Ode to Saturday morning and the opulence of writing in my PJ's.  A steaming cup of black coffee, a handful of cold cherries and a rice cake smothered in peanut butter at my elbow.  Seagulls screech over the crashing waves at Big Sur ebbing from my Media Player.  A setting decadent as a piece of rich dark chocolate. 

What more could a writer want?  THEIR BOOK PUBLISHED!

The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost.    
                                                                                                                        Gilbert K. Chesterton 

A query letter was my next mountain to scale.  Daunting and foreboding.  I knew it must start with a "hook" like my story, something that will grab the readers attention.  And it must be short!

Research . . . write, then rewrite.  It took weeks before I had something solid in place.  Something I was ready to read in class, if asked.  And I was . . .

Why was reading aloud so terrifying?  But I knew the answer . . . self-doubt!

May 1, 2010

Mr. Mick Silva, Editor

WaterBrook Press

Dear Mr. Silva,

              “Why in the hell did you call 911 when I tried to commit suicide?”

              This was part of a message left on my answering machine by my husband, a Vietnam vet, three months before he took his own life.  Devastated, I could not comprehend why our men and women die by their own hand after surviving the ravages of war.  I knew I wasn’t alone suffering in silence, watching the man I love destroy himself.  I knew tens of thousands, perhaps millions of other families live this nightmare with no place to turn.   

              

              Diary of a Vet's Wife, subtitled Loving and living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, my memoir at 96,000 words covers an eighteen year period in my life lifted from personal journals.  This heartfelt love story took sixteen years to write and reads like a novel. 

Divorced with three young children, I longed to find the love of my life.  Eighteen months later we meet, oblivious to the perils waiting and all I would sacrifice for my dream.   Laced with love and heartbreak, secrets and fear, my unique story shows the family dynamics of living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, a normal reaction to abnormal life threatening stress.  I later learned I too had developed PTSD from living with my husband’s illness.  The reader will slip into my world like a fly on the wall as I take them places most have never been, while bonding with others who know the terrain that only love dare travel.

            In search of reason, I stumbled upon the peace that surpasses all understanding when I came to know God’s love as a born-again Christian, convinced He held my hand and walked with me through the valley of the shadow of death.  

            My expertise is that I survived to tell this story.  I’m committed to get this book into the hands of as many people as possible, exposing them to a deadly epidemic infesting our nation and the world, drawing attention to the raw wounds of war destroying families.  After all these years, suicide is still on the increase.  Each suicide is a tragedy . . . .     

Manuscript and Book Proposal are completed.  May I submit my work for consideration? 

Critique given in class showed compassion and concern, confirming the need I saw for those touched by war.  Now to find an agent and/or publisher who held the same vision . . . the same passion.

Within weeks, I attended the Orange County Christian Writers Conference.  Mick Silva, an acquisition editor with WaterBrook Press, was key speaker, later hosting a workshop.  He announced he would accept any well-written book proposal.  I only had my query letter, which he agreed to take a look at.   

But it wasn't meant to be.  By the time I returned from my family reunion in Ohio, he was no longer with WaterBrook Press.  He was on his own.   

Now I had to go to Plan B.  The problem . . . I didn't have a plan B.

Lesson learned . . . my two cents

Every writer who wants to be published must have a Plan B!  And maybe a Plan C and a Plan D as well.

Write Your Heart Out . . .

The trick is keeping your heart open.     Natalie Goldberg

May 5, 2011

It's a glorious Thursday morning, and the highway beacons, but instead of my enchanting trip to Santa Barbara, I'm here at my computer pounding on the keys.  Work has taken over my writing time, and this week I had to skip school.  Not only am I writing a blog, but I'm researching ways to market my book.  The resources are endless, requiring the patience of Job.        

First, I want to thank all for your words of encouragement.  I know you're with me, even though I can't see you.  This week I received a few comments that started me thinking . . .

     *  Write to the title
     *  I want to know more about your book
     *  Your date changes are confusing

This blog began as a tool to move me into publishing.  Accountability for my time and actions was my purpose.  Most entries have been lighthearted and chatty, other than the first.  But the time has come when I must share more.  And I'm uncomfortable.  So please bear with me.

Write your heart out.  Never be ashamed of your subject and your passion for your subject.     Joyce Carol Oates

War has gone on since the beginning of man's creation.  And will continue until the end of time.  This necessary evil brings death and pain not only to its victims, but also to the warriors and their loved ones covering our small planet.  It's not the way we'd like it to be . . . it is the way it is.

Brave men and women fight wars in hostile lands where life is valued differently.  Armed with rifles, they're exposed to sights and sounds no human being should ever witness.  And at times, they must engage in unthinkable acts to save their friends which riddles them with shame and guilt.  Or they survive an ambush and the others don't. 

Can you imagine the horror? 

It's not a movie in the theater you pay to watch . . . it's real life!  And it's happening this moment in remote parts of the world.  How does a warrior return to a normal life with this running through their head?

It's called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder . . . a normal reaction to abnormal life threatening stress. 

Those who know me know my story.  They know what I wrote about, and why.  And those who don't know me, other than through this blog, will one day share an experience . . . one that will be hard to forget.

My book?  It's a love story.  And shows how I met the love of my life and we were married.  He was a Vietnam vet.  I didn't know he had post traumatic stress disorder.  I didn't know what post traumatic stress disorder was.  Nor did I know I would develop PTSD from living with my husband's illness. 

The ravages of war tainted our marriage eclipsing it into a nightmare.  And by grace alone, my love gave me the strength and the courage to survive.

I Corinthians 13:4-7  Love suffers long and is kind . . . bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  

Excerpt from my book proposal . . .

Diary of a Vet's Wife shows the innocence of love unblemished with hope and promise, unaware of the imminent demons vowing destruction.  And all too soon her impossible dream is shattered by nightmares her husband doesn't recall and hidden pain he refuses to share.  Her love is unyielding, her journey is long.  She retreats to a life of secrets in order to spare the children and her family from the truth, yet she has no place to turn.

The reader will slip into her world like a fly on the wall as she takes them places most have never been, while bonding with others who know the terrain that only love dare travel.

So there you have it . . .

Lesson learned . . . my two cents

Be open to your readers opinions . . . they're one of the reasons you write.

Show compassion to our brave men and women who have served and suffered for this nation, and our safety. You never know what a person is going through by looking at them.  Would you lay down your life for your country?  Please do me a favor.  When you see someone in uniform, or meet someone who has served in our military, go up to them, shake their hand and say, "Thank you."  It would mean so much to them.  I know from experience . . .

Publicize Your Book . . .

It was after 2 a.m.  I heard a noise.  Was someone outside, or were the pipes banging?  I slipped out of bed and tiptoed through the dark house.  "OUCH!" I yelped, smashing my foot into the corner of a bookcase.  Pain, pain, pain!  I hobbled to the kitchen for an icepack.  Forget the noise.  I crawled back into bed.  Ever try to sleep with an icepack under your covers?

By Easter morning my middle toe was BLACK, topped with one Double-Dip Red toenail.  I think I broke my toe!

Church was joy-filled.  And brunch was scrumptious . . . I had a chicken liver omelet!  But the Ronald Reagan museum was out.  Too much walking.  Sorry Sandy.  Medicinenet.com said to keep my foot elevated.

Publicize Your Book by Jacqueline Deval is an outstanding source brimming with ideas.  So many my head was swimming.  So I decided to start with one or two.  Dig deep and do them well before moving on to the next.  Whether you're trying to land an agent, or publish yourself, this book offers valuable marketing tools . . . knowledge that will put you steps ahead of most writers.

Write a blog once a week . . . sits at the top of my TO DO LIST.  Of course, I still work, go to school, clean, shop, cook, and all the other mundane chores a woman feels obligated to do.  Sometimes I wonder why.  But then I remember . . . my mother!  And that's how I was raised.  I often think . . . what would happen if I didn't make my bed today?  Would the Clean and Tidy Fairy turn me into a toad?  Being a writer, I do love to stay in my PJ's and write until noon.  That is, when I'm not working.

April 21, 2011

Heavy clouds left a mist clinging to my windshield like frosted glass.  But I didn't care.  It was Thursday and I was on my way to class.  Only thing to stop me would be a mudslide across Pacific Coast Highway, which only happened once.  Or gas reaching $8.00 a gallon!

Yet, once I reached Santa Barbara, the heaven's parted spilling warm sunshine over the lush green mountains, sprinkled with tiny houses like confetti after a party.  I love this town.

Cork Millner's easy-going, yet unique style of teaching captivates his students.  The first two-thirds of each semester deals with the fundamentals of Unleashing Your Creativity and Writing Creative Nonfiction.  Though my memoir was complete prior to my first class, I am now filled with brilliant ideas of what to write next.  Each class I've attended I've learned something new, something I never knew before.

Did you know that Shakesphere was the first writer to use a comma?

My Journey into Publishing . . . 

Spring 2010

If you do not write for publication, there is little point to writing at all.  
                                                                                         George Bernard Shaw

How You Can Become A Selling Writer, the introduction page in Write From The Start, grabbed my attention.  And many others.  However, my first real lesson began in Part Three, How To Sell What You Write.  Chapter twelve started with my first mind-bender, Writing Irresistable Query Letters.  To be honest, I had no idea what a query letter was . . . nor how to write one.  After all, I wrote a book.  Was this necessary?  Yes!!

Cork Millner drummed the need for this instrument into my head each week.  No query letter, no book sale.  I had no choice.  This painful process took me back to square one, screaming and kicking because I knew he was right.

Think of a query as a fishing trip . . . you're trying to hook an editor into taking a look at your manuscript.

A book query is a one-page sales pitch.  It should include the following information (plus some):

   *  The focus, theme or slant of your book
   *  Why the book will fill a need
   *  The potential market for your book
   *  Your expertise on the subject
   *  Your publishing credits, (if any)

And when I heard what it was, my immediate reaction was IMPOSSIBLE!  You've got to put all that on one page?  You're kidding me!  It's like writing the Lord's Prayer on the head of a pin.

Lessons I've Learned . . . my two cents.

Where do I find time to write?  The number one question all writers have.  In the beginning, I wrote in the evenings after work, but my brain was fried.  And so was my writing.  Yet on weekends, I could start in the morning and write into the night.  What could I do during the week?

I'm a morning person, but I had to leave for work at 7:15 a.m.  How could I write in the morning?  I read about a writer who set her alarm 30 minutes earlier every three days and left it there.  A gradual process of "making time to write."  Your body and your mind barely notice.  And it worked!!! 

In the end, I got up at 3:40 a.m., made coffee and was at my computer ready to write by 4 a.m.  And for me this was perfect!!  My mind loved the discipline and the words flowed freely.  And I came to know the morning bird who sang first, slowly waking all the other birds.  A glorious way to start the day . . .

Lesson learned . . . You don't find the time, you make the time!

In The Beginning . . .

Where do I begin?  I met the love of my life, we were married, a thousand other things happened, and then he took his own life.  And he was a Vietnam Vet.

My husband fought a war on foreign soil and came back in one piece.  On the outside that is.  I fought the demons that followed him home because of that war, for the next fifteen years.  Like Charles Dickens said, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times."  I knew them both well.  So I wrote a book.  A book to help deal with the grief, confusion, anger, memories, and my broken heart, and to reach out to the endless others who are on the same journey.  There are still wars, men and women are still fighting, and wives and husbands are still desperate to make sense of it all.  I know I am.

And now I'm writing a blog because I wrote a book.  And my book wants to be published.  Even though I don't know how, I will figure it out.  There's so much to learn.  Where do I start?  Agents, editors, publishers, marketing . . . fear.

I feel like I'm about to climb a mountain after dark with only a flashlight and a sky filled with stars.